That jokes
Your hairline's so messed up that even Martin Luther King Jr. couldn't have a dream about it.
You don't want to know why it takes so long to put a dead woman in a mass-produced coffin in a pre-buried grave dug by machinery that is then filled by mourners.
Kid starts short-coming people in school. Teacher asks, "Why are you doing that?"
He responds, "I wanted to paint the walls red for Christmas!"
Do you ever get that feeling where you're just going through a school parking lot, then you realize that there are no parking lots?
What is the difference between a gay male who is not physically challenged giving a blowjob to a gay male that is not physically challenged, and a gay male who is physically challenged giving a blowjob to a gay male who is not physically challenged?
A gay male who is not physically challenged who receives a blowjob from a gay male who is physically challenged would still not believe that the physically challenged male is gay because the gay male who is not physically challenged is the definition of an asshole.
So I saw a 15 year old kid near a 15 year old girl checking her out.
Then I told him, "What are you doing?"
He told me he will decorate her locker, donate a lot of money to her, and buy her a lot of stuff.
He then told me how easy would that be?
I told him: "That sounds pretty SIMPle."
Yo, hairline go so far back that your dad found it before you did.
My friend Nickiya wanted to know what animal she'd be. I said that she would be a "Ni-cat-a."
Your mama so fat that when she went to McDonald's, they said, "Sorry, you've had enough, ma'am."
What happened to the eight-year-old boy that needed to go to the bathroom during church?
The priest stopped him on the way there.
What do you call a tree 🌲 that is magic? A magic tree 🌳.
That's kinda sus, you know?
Aunt: On the internet, buying weight loss pills for 15 dollars.
Niece: I found that show on Netflix that you wanted to watch. It's 3 dollars to watch.
Aunt: I'm not paying for that shit.
Niece: Yet you sit there and buy weight loss pills.
Two people are in a restaurant. Person #1 doesn’t order anything, and Person #2 orders a chili.
Person #1: “Aren’t you gonna eat your bowl of chili?”
Person #2: “No, you can have it.”
Person #1: “Ok, thanks...”
Person 1 starts eating his food only to find half of a dead rat! He vomits all of the food back into the bowl.
Person #2: “That’s about as far as I got too!”
Your hairline goes so far back that even Gavin, who looks like a monkey, can't see it!
What did the cow say to the sheep?
“Moo!”
What did the sheep say to the cow?
“That was a bad joke!”
Your hairline is so far back that Green Lantern became Blue Torch.
Captain of the Titanic: “Where’s all that f***ing water coming from?”
Atoms never touch, so it means, we haven't touched each other or anything. So, sir, I did not drop-kick that child.
There's two types of emo people:
1. People that cut side to side.
2. And people that cut up and down.
The most efficient is up and down.