Technology jokes

Stephen Hawking talks by clicks. Two clicks is "hi," and five is "dab me up."

Stephen Hawking shows up to a car meet-up.

Stephen Hawking's last words were the Windows closing sound.

Guy: Fight me on Xbox. Guy: Oh right, you don't have one *laughs*

Me: Fight me in real life. Me: Oh right, you don't have a real life. *INSERTS APPLE BOTTOM JEANS*

2021-2022

What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?

This car in RC-XD.

Your mum was so poor that she went to rob the bank, but she left because she couldn't find the cameras. She left her son, and the security [girl] gave him the camera.

Yo mama so fat, I took a picture of her last year, and it is still printing.

What's the difference between a terrorist base and an elementary school?

— Don't ask me. How should I know? I'm just the drone pilot.

Yo mama so fat that when she sat on an AirPod Pro, she turned it into an iPad!

What is something an orphan's phone does not have?

Home buttons.

What does a frozen loading screen and a Make-A-Wish kid have in common?

They both couldn't make it all the way.

What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?

RC-XD

Is Google male or female?

Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a fruit joke.

What do you call a piece of tech that acts emo?

Cutting-edge Technology.

Mommy is a YouTuber, she can never spend time with me.

Your mum sat on a phone, and she turned it into a pancake.

Q: Why do orphans get on Facebook?

A: Because they get liked.

What is this website?

Me: Dad, my phone is broken.

Dad: How?

Me: I clicked the home button, but I'm still at school.

Dad: Stupid.

I made this one up myself just now.

Stephen Hawking would be a good pilot because the aircraft would be the first to take off and land in autopilot.