Still jokes

Who can jump the highest?

Emos, some of them are still falling.

You might think that tigers or lions are the best jumpers, but in my opinion, it's emos, because some of them are still in the air.

Your mum's so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing.

Bianca: Mr. Doeken, even though I completed my test, you still said it was "late." Why is that?

Mr. Dowon: Bianca, for the LAST TIME, MY LAST NAME IS DOWON!

Bianca (🤨): Are you sure?

Mr. Dowon (😒): What do you need, Bianca?

Bianca: It's Bianca!

Mr. Dowon: Are you sure?

I don't trust anything that bleeds for more than 5 days and is still alive.

You wanna hear a construction joke?

I'm still workin' on it!

It's past April Fool's Day, and we still have a joke as president.

Do you want to hear a building joke?

I am still working on it.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!

A Chelsea fan called Timo Werner on his phone to encourage him during his bad form. Timo Werner still missed all the calls.

"Bonus, we can even watch a movie and still chat! Love you!

Which one do you want to watch? 😀"

Friend A: "Why are you still a virgin, bro?"

Friend B: "I was until last night."

Friend A: "Nah, nah, who with?"

Friend B: "Your sister."

Friend A: "I don't have a sister."

Friend B: "Just wait 9 months, you'll see."

I was walking home, then I saw a "Wait" sign. A man came and took me. I'm still waiting for him to ask for a lesson.

Your mom: Your plate is full, that's enough food on your plate.

Me: My plate is not full, I still see the white of the plate.

A lesbian couple and a gay couple are going to San Francisco. Who made it first?

The lesbian couple got there lickety-split.

The gay couple was still packing their shit.

I saw two really tall guys. I walked up and said, "I didn't know we still have the Twin Towers!"

Son asks dad, "How much does marriage cost?"

Dad: "I don’t know, son. I’m still paying for it."

Do you like soccer? My favorite player is Ronaldo, but we can still get Messi.

At the job interview, they asked me, “Where do you see yourself in five years?”

I told him, “I think we’ll still be using mirrors in five years.”

What's the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels?

Jack Daniels is still killing Indians.