Still jokes
What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute?
Your job still sucks!
Most of these jokes are plane, but they still hit.
I saw two really tall guys. I walked up and said, "I didn't know we still have the Twin Towers!"
Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing!
Yo momma so fat, I took a photo of her last year and it's still printing.
I can't have my Oreos 😭 Why?
My dad still hasn't came back with that God damn milk.
You're so fat, you drank an invisibility potion, and everyone could still see you!
A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going on a cruise. Who gets there first?
Obviously, the lesbian couple; they got their lickety-split. The gay couple was still packing their shit.
What's the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels?
Jack Daniels is still killing Indians.
Do you like soccer? My favorite player is Ronaldo, but we can still get Messi.
At the job interview, they asked me, “Where do you see yourself in five years?”
I told him, “I think we’ll still be using mirrors in five years.”
Son asks dad, "How much does marriage cost?"
Dad: "I don’t know, son. I’m still paying for it."
Me: What has two legs and bleeds?
Friend: Um, women? Obviously?
Me: Actually, half a dog. So you're still right.
The worst part about working for the department of unemployment is when you get fired, you still have to show up the next day.
Today, I asked my phone "Siri" why am I still single, and it activated the front camera.
What's the difference between a Russian potato and a U.S. potato?
The U.S. potato can still compete in the Special Olympics.
A bully says, "I get 10x more girls than you" to a gay kid.
Then the gay kid says, "10 X 0 is still 0."
I saw your mother get into a white Ford Taurus on the corner of Milton and Halliburton, and you're still trying to tell me she ain't got no job cause she "can't get a ride to work?"
Wanna hear a construction joke?
Nah, I'm still working on it.
I have a joke about construction.
I'm still working on it.