Still jokes
Jack and Jill went up the hill to start to build the still for Jill.
Jack stopped and said to drunkin' Jill, "To build this still will take so long."
Jill said to Jack, "Well, f--k the still and kiss my ass, and watch me take another pill!"
Jack and Jill went up the hill. They turned to drunks and have no will. Jill said to Jack, "Your love reveal, then think of building me a still."
How many dead babies does it take to put in a new light bulb? Not thirteen, cuz my basement is still dark. Let's try fourteen.
Why do tables never need wheelchairs?
Because even without the ‘t’ they are still able.
Want to hear a joke about construction? I'm still working on it.
I’ll never forget my grandpa's last words to me...
“Are you still holding the ladder??”
What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eyed deer.
What do u call a deer with no eyes or legs? Still no eyed deer.
What do u call a deer with no eyes, no legs and no balls? Still no f*#$in eyed deer.
Stephen Hawking listens to the song "I Am Still Standing" and cries to himself.
My wife still misses me...
But her aim is getting better!
The last thing I told my ex after we broke up was, "At least we're still cousins!" 😂
Brother: "I can hear you using the vibrator every night, I’m right here if you need help."
Sister: "That’s my f***ing electric toothbrush!"
Brother: "Oh, well the offer still stands."
I still to this day remember my grandpa's last words.
"I'M ALLERGIC TO FUCKING CATS!"
Two tourists climb a mountain that utters certain doom.
One tourist falls down. The tourist that's still on the mountain says, "You ok down there?"
The other tourist says, "Can't I just rest in peace?!"
How many babies does it take to replace a light bulb? I'm guessing more than 10 cause it's still dark in my basement.
What are you doing, son? It has been an hour, and you are still in front of the mirror closing your eyes.
Mum, actually I want to see how I look while sleeping...
What do you call a deer with no legs and no eyes?
Still no idea. 😂
Why do men sag their pants so low and still wear a belt?
The same reason women bring their purse on a date and don't pay.
Do you want to hear a joke about a construction?
Sorry, still working on it!
Two husbands walk into a bar.
The first one says, "My wife is an angel."
The second one says, "You're lucky, mine is still alive."
How many dead babies does it take to clean my refrigerator?.....it gotta be more than 4 because the fridge is still dirty.