Still jokes

Why does Jesus never vacation on Earth?

Because he traveled down about 2,000 years ago, got with some Jewish chick, and they're still talking about it!

Who can shave 20 times a day and still have a beard? -- A barber.

Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 10. He replied, "I still love Vista, baby."

How many dead prostitutes does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously not 8, because it's still dark in my basement.

I tried to explain to my 4 year old son that it's perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants. But he's still making fun of me.

How many dead prostitutes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

More than three because the basement is still dark!

Two men were talking about their wives. The first man says, "My wife is an angel." The second man says, "You're lucky, mine's still alive."