I sit because I can't stand you.
What do you call a hippopotamus that stands out from the crowd?
A hipster!
Roses are red, Violets are blue, When life gets tough, I'll stand by you.
When I was recently standing in front of a huge puddle with my buddy, I remembered how he tricked me a week ago. So I tricked him...
If your house is cold, just stand in the corner. It's always 90 degrees there.
What do the initials UAW stand for?
United Awesome Whores.
I'd like to have kids one day.
I don't think I could stand them any longer than that, though.
What does WTC stand for?
"What Trade Centre?"
What type of comedy can't Steven Hawking do?
Stand-up comedy.
A chemical store burned down, and the firefighter just stood there, but at the end, the store fire just went out by itself. But the store owner still got angry.
Store owner: Why didn't you take out the fire?
Firefighter: Yeah, but it went out by itself.
Store owner: But still, why?
Firefighter: Your chemical store sells H20.
Store owner: Oh, I get it now!
One day little Jonny is in class. It is the second day back to school. The teacher is annoyed with the kids, so she goes to the front of the class and says, "If you think you are stupid, stand up." Little Jonny stood up.
The teacher asked him, "Why do you think you're stupid?" Little Jonny said, "I don't think I am stupid."
Then the teacher asked little Jonny why he stood up. Then little Jonny replied, "I just felt bad seeing you standing here alone."
NASA stands for naughty aliens spewing apricots.
Some say Stephen Hawking couldn't stand up for himself 😂
My friend that was in a wheelchair was getting bullied, so I said, "Stand up for yourself."
What does FNAF stand for? Five Nasty Ass Fools.
Two Native Americans
Unwittingly walk into a gay bar and sit down to order a pitcher of beer. As they're sitting there sucking back on their ale, a gay guy walks up and says, "How would you boys like a blow job?"
The one Indian stands up and decks the guy, knocking him unconscious. He then sits back down and finishes his beer.
His buddy looks over and says, "Hey Joe, what did you do that for?"
Joe replies, "Not sure but it was something about getting a job!"
The twin towers were the best soldiers ever. Stand together, fall together!
Why can't orphans stand Darth Vader?
Because he's their father.
The "d" in Africa stands for democracy...
NASA stands for... National Adult S3x Association.
