Sports jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know how to hit a home run.
I was playing football with my friends, and I got tackled and got a penalty. Suddenly, the ground started shaking, and Penaldo emerged from the mud. He took the penalty, but since it wasn't Andorra, he missed. Shame on you, Penaldo!
What's a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross country.
Why can orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is.
At baseball practice...
"Hey John, did you bring the bucket of balls?"
"No, but I got two right here."
Why didn't the skeleton play football?
His heart wasn't in it!
Why can't Chinese people play baseball?
They eat the bat.
Balls are annoying. They just bounce and never keep still.
I was swimming in a pool on my vacation when a fan of mine approached me. He said he wanted an autograph and gave me a pen to sign it. I accidentally dropped the pen in the pool. Suddenly, Penaldo came out of NOWHERE and dove to save it. He said he always dives for pens.
He said he like Neymar so HIT THAT BOY LIKE FROM THE BACK!
So Kobe Bryant walked into a bar, just kidding, he's dead and his fame went spiraling out of control.
Arsenal
I love to play catch with my dad! He's never there to catch the ball, though.
What do you call it when a boxer cums? Busting a nut.
What’s similar between the twin towers and Kobe Bryant?
They both can crash down.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
What did the helicopter say?
Helicopter: "Kobe!"
What's the best part of having sex on a golf course?
The hole experience.
My friend that used to be married was making jokes about me being short. Then I told him, "Your marriage was so short it made me look like Shaquille O'Neal."
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.