Sports jokes

Pen

My friend had an allergic reaction after he ate a peanut.

We got his EpiPen to help him when Penaldo appeared because he heard the word "PEN". He tried stealing the pen, but I said, "No pens for you," and "Brentford". He cried and ran away. Shame on you, Penaldo the fraud!

Penaldo

Was invited to the inauguration of an I-pad.

We were all ready to begin the event. I was supposed to cut the ribbons, but before I could do that, Penaldo jumped outta nowhere and shouted, "I DON'T WANT I-PAD, I ONLY WANT TO STATPAD!"

Shame on Penaldo for ruining the event! 😡

Memes

Titanic

What do the Titanic and the Montréal Canadiens have in common? They both sank to the bottom of the Atlantic.

Orphanage

I recently became the coach of an orphanage baseball team.

Because I hate dealing with parents.

Sport

Why do gay people like sports?

Because they get to play with balls.

Difference

What’s the difference between a prostitute and a hockey player?

A hockey player gets to shower after three periods.

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  • Misunderstanding

    A man is meeting a client in Japan, but arrives a day early. When night hit, he went out with a prostitute. They're having sex, but the prostitute kept shouting "Fuji, Fuji, Fuji!", so the man thinks he's doing a good job. The next day, the man meets his client and they go golfing, and the client gets a hole in one. The man praises him by going "Fuji, Fuji, Fuji!". His client turns around confused and says, "What do you mean wrong hole!?"

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  • Hitler

    What's the difference between Hitler and Usain Bolt?

    One actually finished a race.

    Pristiano Penaldo

    I was exploring the Dubai trophy factory when someone came crashing in. It was him, Pristiano Penaldo. He held the workers at gunpoint, forcing them to make him another plastic Mickey Mouse award or he will dive and sue them for assaulting him. Shame on you, pendu!

    Orphan

    Why do orphans miss half their basketball season? Cause they don't have home games.