SOS jokes

Yo mama is so fat that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl and a plate and ketchup to the red zone.

Yo mama so fat that she broke the scale when she put one foot on it.

The terrorists said over the intercom, "We're coming up to our destination, so we can't go over it, we can't go under, we have to go through it."

"Disease" technically means "lack of ease," so if a girl is hard to get, call her a disease.

That's what Elliot Rodger did.

You're so ugly you make the blind kids cry 😭😭

Your forehead is so big that it was used as a billboard.

Why did the orphan go to church?

So they had someone to call Father.

Yo dad's so stupid, he came back after he got the milk.

My wife and I just decided we don't want to have children.

So if anyone wants them, our contact information is below.

"Sticks and stones break my bones."

A crowbar does it so much quicker.

Joe Mama so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl!

Joe mama so fat, she fell on both sides of the bed.

Little Johnny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something. Then he sees a plastic di**. He asks his mom, "What's that?" and Mom didn't know, so when his dad comes home from work, he sees him with the plastic di** and says, "Son, why you messing with my personal toy?"

Why do orphans play GTA so much?

Because they can be wanted for once.

Yo mama is so ugly that when she went through a face ID, it didn't think she was human.

God, my dad got so pissed during 9/11.

All that work wasted.

I wish my nails were emo so that they would cut themselves.

A hot woman is ready to jump from a bridge and commit suicide when an ugly, stinky homeless man comes up to her and tells her, "Oh baby, you so hot, let's fuck!"

She just yells, "Get the fuck away, you creep!"

He just laughs and says, "Alright, I'll wait down there."

Why do emo kids love dressing up on Halloween so much?

It's their last holiday for them, but at least they're still hanging on...

A man robs a bank and asks a woman, "Did you see that?"

She says, "Yes." So the man shoots her.

He leaves the bank and sees a couple. He asks, "Did you see that?" The husband said, "No, but my wife did!"