Q:What was my son's last words before he died. A:Bye dad i am going to school.
A Man: I must confess father Priest: what are you her to confess A Man: I hit my wife and blamed her for what happened to our son Priest: and what happened to your son A Man: He said a man raped him Priest: when and where did this happened A Man: a local church, idk which one Priest...by whom? A Man: A priest he said, he said the priest had black hair and blue eyes. kind of like you Priest: ...shit
A father of five puts on gas mask and a hazard suit, and walks outside, but before he could make it, his son came and asked "Dad, what are you wearing?". The father would answer with "A costume for Halloween.". the child asked "can i join?". He said no, for he said it's their last Halloween. *after that, I saw green smoke all over the same house they lived in.
two pedo's are on the beach one pedo said hey get out of my son
The pastor sees little Johnny sitting on the church steps. Little Johnny is fixated on something. The pastor looks closer and sees that Johnny is stirring up something in an old coffee can. He says, "What you got there little Johnny?" "This here is turpentine, the most POWERFUL liquid in the world.", says Johnny. The pastor shakes his head, sits down next to Johnny and says, "Now you know that's not true son. Holy water is the most powerful liquid in the world. One drop of holy water on a pregnant woman's stomach and the next morning she'll pass a baby boy." Little Johnny says, "Well that may be true. But one drop of this on a cats ass and he'll pass a motorcycle!"
Son: Daddy,Why this red soup is so much sweet? Because your mother had diabetes
Well a boy and a girl are in a bath tube together. The little boy says “Hey you see that I’m gonna go ask daddy what it is?” When the little boy asks his dad he says. “Well son that’s your car you try to park it in a girls parking spot.” As the boy runs back he see’s the little girl is missing. It had turned out that the little girl was asking her mama that her spot was and she said. “Well that’s your parking spot never ever let a boy put it in.” When she got back the little boy tried to put the car in well he did and she ended up breaking his car that day.
little johnny's mom got a call from school saying to come over, as she dose she is met by the principal. they go into his office and the principal say "your son is going to be suspended for a week for blowing clouds in the bathroom." the mother responds "he is fifteen, how is he blowing clouds already? bring him in here." a boy walks in and johnnys mother says "this isnt my son, bring him in here i would like a word with him." the principal replies "ma'am, this is clouds." the mother feints
The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed. Father: son you can do butter
1st daughter: Dad I;m lesbian! Dad: oh OK! 2nd daughter: I'm also lesbian Dad: WTF does any 1 in this family love d!cks?!? Son: I do...
I took my son to a drivers school and am surprised because he got his license but soon lost the privilege to drive a car because he ran over my ex on "accident" (I gotta go pay him out of jail)
What's the last thing Asians hear from their parents? My money is my money. Your money is my money. Your wife's money is my money. Always remember that son.
What did the bison say to his son leaving for school? Bye son! Get it? Bye son Bison
Son: Why is my sister’s name Paris?
Dad: Because we conceived her in Paris.
Son: Thanks, dad.
Dad: No problem Quarantine.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said "you know you wanna"
Jill said yes and lifted up her dress they had some fun
But silly Jill forgot her pill and now they have a son
What did the woman say too Micheal Jackson at the beach? Excuse me sir, you're in my son