Someone jokes

What is it called when a gay guy punches someone?

Fruit punch.

Why did the orphan go to church?

So they had someone to call Father.

Why do orphans like to go to church?

So they have someone to call father.

If you're bored, punch an orphan in the face. What is he gonna do, tell his parents?

Why do orphans love role-plays?

Because they can call someone "daddy."

Why did the orphan cheat on his girlfriend with a guy?

Because he wanted someone to call "Mommy" and "Daddy."

A conductor was conducting a song. At the end, he threw his conductor's stick and killed someone. He was put to the electric chair, but nothing happened. They asked why he didn't die, and he replied, "I'm a bad conductor."

Someone should start a vaping company with the slogan: "Vapes that hit harder than your dad." Sales would skyrocket.

What does a computer scientist do when someone tries to fight him?

He waves his arms like a space invader.

Why do orphan girls become prostitutes?

So they can call someone "daddy."

Why do orphans want to be gay?

So they have someone to call "Daddy."

Someone in my class yelled "Jenga!" while watching a documentary about the Twin Towers.

When you suffer from depression and someone tells you to just cheer up, god damn, why didn't I think of that?

I hate it when people say to suck it up... I mean, sometimes I don’t want someone’s dick in my face.

Why are Nepalese bad at chess?

Because someone already killed their king!

Someone: Didn’t we already meet somewhere?

Me: Yeah. That’s why I don’t go there anymore.

*At A Funeral For Someone Who Jumped Off A Building* Victim's Mom: "I wonder what was the last thing that went through his head..."

Me: "Honestly... Probably his ass."

Why was the people's wedding so miserable...

'Cause during the kiss someone farted so loud and stinky, they agreed to never try to have another wedding.

If I had a coin for every time someone said, "If I had a coin," I'd still be living paycheck to paycheck.

What will happen if someone kicks you right in the balls?

You will be like, "Ow, my nuts!"

Guys, if you saw a post from someone pretending to be me, don't listen to them.

I'm just going to be out for 3 days, or maybe for a month break. There are a lot of fakers.