Life would be so much easier if grass was emo.
Because it would cut itself.
What happens when you make an asían girl squirt?
She charges you 10 cents for extra sauce.
Did you know cannibals ate KFC?
Kentucky Fried Children.
Why do orphans like to play GTA?
Because it's the only time they are wanted.
Why is rape worse than death?
Because dead people get way more attention.
A beautiful woman is on the ledge of a bridge about to commit suicide.
A homeless man walks by her and says, "What are you doing?"
She says, "I'm going to jump!"
The homeless man says, "If you're going to kill yourself, do you wanna have sex with me first?"
The woman replies, "No way, creep! Never that!"
The homeless man doesn't seem bothered and says, "That's fine, I'll just wait 'til you're at the bottom."
Two cannibals are eating a clown, when one cannibal looks up and asks the other cannibal: "Does he taste funny to you?"
modern feminism.
A straight man and a gay man are talking. The straight man says, "I'm wanted in 2 states for murder." and the gay man replies with, "Oh, that sucks. I'm wanted in 13 for existing."
Why do orphans become criminals? Because they want to know what it's like to be wanted.
Kenny can't find a girlfriend because neither of his sisters can fuck as good as his mom could.
Women: “Men used to go to war, now they go to clubs.”
Men: “Women used to fear their nudes getting leaked, now it’s $3.99.”
What's the difference between an escaped prisoner and an orphan?
Only one is wanted.
Flat Earthers
What's white on top and black on the bottom? Society.
What is Africa's most played game?
The Hunger Games.
Humanity.
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Infinite because feminists can't solve problems.
I love Muslims, they are great at parties!
They have the best fireworks.
