Society jokes
Why can't orphans convert to Catholicism?
Because Catholics believe in no sex before marriage.
Orphan jokes? They protest.
Girl, you must be a Muslim because you are only 5 years old, yet you know how to give great head.
I beat up a deaf kid the other day. I had to. He kept throwing up gang signs.
Orphan: *crying* You: Do you know where your parents are? Orphan: No. Your Friend: They don't have parents!!! You: 😂 I know.
The "f" in orphan stands for family.
Except there is no "f."
Why did the orphan join the baseball team?
Because he knew when he got to third base he could head home.
Yo mama is so ugly, if she got a pound for every boy that found her unattractive, boys would find her attractive.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a good body these days?
I think Jeffrey Dahmer had the right idea, just put it in the freezer.
Women be like don't tell me what to wear, proceeds to tell men what to wear.
What makes genders and Twin Towers similar?
There used to be two of them, and now it's a sensitive subject.
What do British politics and transgender people have in common?
Both aren't what they used to be...
What can't play home in baseball? They don't have one.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
If orphans made phones, it wouldn't have a home button.
I got kicked out of the school library for placing a women's rights book in the fiction section.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims: they went through a hundred stories in 10 seconds.
Teacher: Don’t run into the road!
Down syndrome: Weeeeee!
Teacher: Lol, now he’s a mashed potato.
I remember when I was at a funeral at the age of 6. I was with my grandma and asked, "Grandma, Grandma, why is that man in a box?"
And she says, "He's in a better place now." I look at her confused and ask, "What kind of box did he live in before?! How is this box better than the last one?! It's just a box!"
And to this day I am still not allowed to go to funerals.
One day I was with my mom and we had no money on the credit card, and we live far, and my mom was hungry.
A guy and his friend had a car and asked us if we were lost. We said no, we have no ride, no money, and my mom is hungry. So the guy would take us for a blowjob each, so I was driving the car and my mom gave both guys a blowjob. We had to get out of the car to look for something, then the two guys went in the car and told us we got bad news and good news. I asked what the bad news was. They said that they're not taking us home, so I asked what the good news was. They told me that they fed my mom and drove off. I guess where they left us wasn't a long walk and my mom wasn't hungry anymore.