New Society Jokes - Page 158 - Worst Jokes Ever

Police Report: Looking for a female, light brown hair, blue eyes, freckles, and a small scar on her right check.

Last seen on CCTV wearing see-through bottoms, a pink top, and a vibrating dildo hanging out of her arse. If you find this woman, please get her to charge the dildo for excessive fun.

What’s an orphan’s favorite holidays? Mothers’ and Father’s Day.

Orphans are human, too! They just don't know who their parents are or where! I know four sisters named Mariah, Kariah, Lariah, and Iariah and they said they are orphans, too! And they are sad and they don't like your jokes!

What do you call an orphan? Homeless.

What's an orphan's worst favorite movie? Home Alone.

Why can't homeless people find a home? Because they're orphans.

"Peado van, peado van, stay away, peado van, peado van, take her away."

I can't afford food, I can't afford childcare, might as well just get the money out of her.

What's the motto for a pizza place that's also an abortion clinic: Your loss is our sauce.

Stop the orphan jokes!

Me at the Anti-Orphan Jokes convention. 💣🗡🔪🧨🔫

What do orphans and Trump supporters have in common?

No one likes them.

Why did the orphan chase the family? Because he was jealous that he did not have a family.

Why don’t orphans have sex?

Because they have no one to call “daddy.”

What do you call 2 homeless people throwing rocks at each other? "Pillow Fight!"

I remember when I was at a funeral at the age of 6. I was with my grandma and asked, "Grandma, Grandma, why is that man in a box?"

And she says, "He's in a better place now." I look at her confused and ask, "What kind of box did he live in before?! How is this box better than the last one?! It's just a box!"

And to this day I am still not allowed to go to funerals.

What did the orphan say to the house? Can I live here?

Why do orphans like to go to church?

Because they can finally call someone "father!"

I have two things I wanna say:

1. When people swear, stop taking it so fucking literally. If someone calls you a bitch, they're not calling you a female dog. If they call you a cunt, they're not calling you a woman's private part, they are calling you either an idiot, scaredy cat/baby, or something along those lines, ffs.

2. wtf

What can happen if you bring a hooker into a stranger's house? He will ask you, "Really, are you nuts?"

What can you tell [as] a difference between [a] man and a woman [in a] relationship?

Both of them are just full of shit.

A young orphan boy goes to school for the first time. A bigger boy comes and punches him. He says, "What are you gonna do, cry to your mommy?" The boy cries.

Next morning, he wakes up and comes to school. The same thing happens, but the older boy brings his friends. This time, after he says, "You gonna tell your mom?", the little boy says, "Yes, I will tell them that there is company coming over."