Size jokes

Your Mom is so friking fat, that when she ripped her pants and went to the seamster, they said, "We don't sew curtains!"

My peepee was big, now it's small.

If there was a zombie apocalypse, girls would make a "forehead apocalypse" since it is so big.

You may have a footlong, but I have a SHENLONG. :)

Yo mama so fat, when she got ran over, the van did a 360 flip to Mars!

The best part of working at an orphanage is you can give them family-size chips.

Yo mama is so fat, when she was a spy, she was called "double obese."

Yo momma's so fat, she rolled out the bed, out the room, down the stairs, smashed through the window, rolled down the road, and got stuck in the Grand Canyon.

Yo momma so fat not even Dora could explore her.

Your mom uses the equator as a belt.

Yo momma so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the floor cracked up.

Yo mamma so fat that she like that ocean, we haven't even explored 5% of her yet.

Yo momma so fat, I asked her to save me a seat, so she sat down and she saved 10, and one by one the legs started popping off.

Your mom is so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

I saw my midget neighbor at a bus stop.

"Jump in, I'll give you a lift home," I said.

"Bugger off!" he shouted back.

"What an ungrateful little man," I thought as I zipped up my backpack and continued my walk.

Your mom was so fat that she couldn't have a man and couldn't go through the door.

I'M JOKING, DON'T GET MAD!

Mine never stops.

Bro, my forehead is so big whenever I need to find something on it, I need the exact coordinates.

"Joe Mama so fat she plays pool table the Earth."

Your hairline is so big, it's bigger than the universe!