Size jokes
Yo mama so fat, when she ordered a water bed they gave her the Pacific Ocean.
Why can't dwarfs be depressed?
Because they are compressed.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
The grass tickles their balls.
Your forehead is so big you could land a plane on it.
Your forehead [is] so big that if I drew an H on it, Kobe could have landed there.
Why can't orphans have chips? Because it's family size.
Why couldn't the orphan buy chips?
They were all family sized.
I hate writing dwarf jokes, but I normally keep them short.
Your forehead is so large, if I drew an H on it, maybe Kobe could've landed.
Yo forehead so large, it has its own gravitational pull.
You say this to your friend, "Damn, your nuts are bigger than mine!" *thinks the wrong way*.
Friend: I must order more nuts.
Your forehead is so big Mega Mind gets jealous.
Normal people have a four-head, but bro... you got a fourteen-head.
This joke's short just like Joe Biden's penis.
Oh wait, if I were to make a joke to the size of Joe Biden's penis, I wouldn't write a joke.
Yo mama's so fat, her pad is a king-size mattress.
Big
What is large, grey, and it doesn't matter? An Irrelephant! Hahahahahahahahaha! Hahaha!
She's so fat that when she steps onto a wood floor, the floorboard doesn't creak, it screams: "Goddamn!!!" before it snaps from the weight.
Damn, you look out of this world because you got a big head like an alien.
Your mama so fat that when you were born, yo mama gave you carpet burn.