Sister

Sister jokes

Word

  • A girl tried 77.34 (77.34) times to think of a word opposite of BYE. Then her brother divided the word BYE. 77.34 divided by 100. TRY IT!!

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  • Onion

  • My sister told me only onions make you cry, so I always hit her back when she hit me, but I hit her with a shoe only to catch her cry.

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  • Alphabet

  • The teacher asked a young boy in primary school, "Can you tell me the alphabet?"

    To which the boy replies, "No."

    The teacher then sets his homework to learn the alphabet.

    At home, the boy goes up to his mum, who is on the phone, and asks, "Can you tell me the alphabet?"

    "Shut up," she replied.

    The boy goes to his dad, who just won the footie match, and asks, "Can you teach me the alphabet?"

    But the dad is too busy celebrating and shouting, "Hell yeah! Hell yeah! Yeaaahh!"

    The boy goes to his big brother and asks him to teach him the alphabet.

    But his brother is singing, "I'm Michael Jackson, I'm Michael Jackson!"

    The boy goes to his sister and asks her for the alphabet.

    But his sister is singing, "In my big red car, in my big red car!"

    The next day the teacher asks him the alphabet.

    The boy replies, "Shut up."

    "Alright, I'm sending you to the principal's office right now."

    The boy replies, "Hell yeah! Hell yeah! Yeaaahh!"

    In the office, the principal says, "Who do you think you are?"

    The boy replies, "I'm Michael Jackson, I'm Michael Jackson!"

    The principal now says, "How do you think you'll get away with this?"

    The boy then replies, "In my big red car, in my big red car!"

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  • Brother

  • Ok, ok, who is trying to be my "long lost brother"? Because last time I checked, I didn't have any sisters or brothers, so stop trying to steal my fame from me and give up. A lot of other people already know you are fake, so get off this website OR JUST STOP!!!

    Cheese

  • My sister said I was only allowed to grate cheese, so I said to her that I’d prove her wrong.

    The next day my mum asked me why my cheese was tan, and I said it was my own special recipe. My mum loved the cheese but she didn’t like it much after the funeral.

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  • Bowling Ball

  • What’s the difference between your sister and a bowling ball?

    I can only get 3 fingers in a bowling ball!

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  • Adoption

  • My mom told me to look for a bill in her file at her home office. Instead, I grabbed my sister's adoption papers.

    Sis

  • My sis is very funny. Her fave joke is:

    "Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Mr. Nobody." "Mr. Nobody who?" "I just told you!"

    Indian

  • There was an Indian riding in the desert when he saw a little blond-haired white girl up ahead. He heard her crying. So he went up to her and climbed down from his horse and asked her, "Hey, what’s going on? Why are you crying? Where are your parents? What happened?"

    The girl said in a crying, sad voice, "The bandidos came, killed my father, my brothers, then my mother, and raped my sister."

    The Indian just laughed, untied and dropped his breechcloth, then said, “Guess this isn’t your day, is it?”

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