Sister

Sister jokes

Adoption

So, one day I walk up to my sister and tell her that she is adopted because she doesn't look like anyone in the family. She starts to cry. My mom asks why she's crying, and I say I told her she was adopted and I was there for the adoption, and we have papers. It was all a lie. She is not adopted, and everything is fine.

Baby

Here's a list of puns, not all of them are mine.

1. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.

2. Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.

3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.

4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.

5. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”

6. Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!

7. Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!

8. How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!

9. That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!

10. My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!

Name

My sister's name was Philma. We were unfortunate enough to have the last name Coochie. Let's just say no more virgins were at that school.

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  • Name

    A young boy is in a tepee with his father, just after his sister's naming ceremony. Curious to how it works, he asks his dad, "Father, why is my sister's name Tulip?"

    His father responds, "That is her name because a tulip was the first thing she saw when she first opened her eyes."

    The boy was still puzzled. "What about big brother Sparrow?"

    "His name is Sparrow because a sparrow landed on him when he first began walking."

    The boy finally asked how he was named. "Well, we decided to name you the same way as your sister."

    The boy nods with understanding, "Thank you, father."

    "No problem, Two-Dogs-Fucking."

    Incest

    The news of the brother getting sucked off regularly by his sister spread really fast... all over her face 🤤.

    Girlfriend

    What did Joe say when he saw his girlfriend sleeping with his sister?

    Nothing, he just started wanking.

    Boss

    I rang my boss and said, "I’m really sick. I won’t be coming into work." My boss said, "Davo, you're sick again! Really! Just how sick are you now?" I replied, "Well, I’m in bed with my sister!"

    Gf

    GF: What did you use as kissing when you were little?

    Me: My sister.

    SWEET HOME ALABAMAA

    Age

    When I was 8, my sister was half my age. I am 60 now, how old is my sister?

    Comments: 30! Give me an easier question next time!

    Girlfriend

    Every woman will die in five seconds.

    Mother: Dies.

    Sister: Dies.

    Girlfriend: Lives.

    You: 🤬

    Banana

    I caught my sister licking up and down and deep throating a banana. I said, "Why are you doing that for?" She replied, "I'm doing it for practice for your friends."

    Fire

    I will always remember my baby sister's last words: "What is the fire for?"

    Book

    I got my sister a book and she cried there, but I forgot she was blind.

    Rape

    My sister said, "Daddy can you pass the salt?" So I raped her.

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  • Family

    Ur dad lesbian.

    Ur sister a mister.

    Ur family tree LGBT.

    Ur family reunion a homosexual communion.

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  • Reason

    What do you do when your sister asks you “Why are you sad?”

    Reply back with “Because you were born.”