"it never gets old" "just like a sick kid"
what goes up but never past the digits 15? A Make A Wish Kid....
What does a bird say when it gets sick? I flu!
A doctor fell into a well and broke his collarbone. The doctor should attend the sick and leave the well alone! (from a 1940 quotations book)
Jesus seemed like he was probably a good guy; healed the sick, fed the hungry, and gave good advice. Jesus had only one flaw: he was always hanging around.
Where do bunnies go when they're sick?
the hoppital
You want to hear a dirty joke?
This guy and this girl were having sex when the guys boss called to ask why he wasn't at work. The guy responds, "I'm sick" His boss replies, "you don't sound sick" The guy says, "I'm fucking my sister" and hangs up the phone
Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack can eat her candy. He got sick when he got a mouthful of dick and realized her name was Randy
Why is a sick person and California similar? They tend to burn up.
If you were driving when all the sudden a young kid and an old man run right in front of you, what do you hit?
The brakes you sick bastard.
What do dark humor and a person with scoliosis have in common? Both are sick and twisted
What do you call a sick eagle 🦅?
ill-eagle! 😂
I'm American, and I'm sick of people saying America is "the stupidest country in the world." -- Personally, I think Europe is the stupidest country in the world.
If the hairdresser is healthy, the cat is happy. *purr* On the other hand, if the hairdresser is sick, the cat is happy too. *purrs on the bed*
I asked my mom why dad was so pale and sick, she said shut the fuck up and keep digging
So this guy right, he has been through the worst shit in his life. He lost his house, his car, his wife, his kids, everything except his dog. About 2 weeks after he loses everything he goes to apply for a job. He attends work for the first 2 weeks to get his first paycheck and then calls in sick for about a month. He comes back to his boss' office after the month is over and his boss questions him. The man claims, "Sir, I was blowing chunks." "what do you mean by 'blowing chunks' ?" says the boss. The man replies with, " Chunks is the name of my dog..."
What happens when you get a virus-related sickness? It goes viral on Twitter!
duck my sick
I'm sick of crying;tired of trying;yes,i'm still smiling;inside I'm dying
I walk in from work to find my wife dead on the sofa. As I unzip for one last ride she says BOO! What kind of sick fuck does that?
