Show Jokes

Gow do you keep tour friends from boring you with pictures of their children?

Every time they show you a new one, you say, "Oh FUCK yeah!"

*Your friend walks up to you and shows you a picture of an overweight woman*

What would you rate this woman?

A 7

Why?

Because 7 ate 9!

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Why can’t orphans go on game shows

You need a family member

If this post gets 200 likes or comments I will show up in a mrbeast video

A nun, badly needing to use the restroom, walked into a local Hooters. The place was hopping with music and loud conversation and every once in a while "the lights would turn off." Each time the lights would go out, the place would erupt into cheers. However, when the revelers saw the nun, the room went dead silent.

She walked up to the bartender, and asked, "May I please use the restroom? The bartender replied, "OK, but I should warn you that there is a statue of a naked man in there wearing only a fig leaf." "Well, in that case, I'll just look the other way," said the nun. So the bartender showed the nun to the back of the restaurant.

After a few minutes, she came back out, and the whole place stopped just long enough to give the nun a loud round of applause. ! She went to the bartender and said, "Sir, I don't understand. Why did they applaud for me just because I went to the restroom?"

"Well, now they know you're one of us," said the bartender, "Would you like a drink?" "No thank you, but, I still don't understand," said the puzzled nun.

"You see," laughed the bartender, "every time someone lifts the fig leaf on that statue, the lights go out.

Now, how about that drink?"

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

What did the blonde say when I told a rape joke?

Can you show me what rape is

i say hi to sans sans shows is hand and say's is hand to meet you and we both lath

There is a feminist group in my town

It is called Gal-qaeda

(I actually got this from the simpsons, so credit to the show)

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

What's Technoblade's favorite show and is the only one he can relate to?

Peppa Pig: Peppa Dies!

Every body loves guns! Everytime I show them mine, they give me free stuff.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

I asked my friend if they will show me something retarded. He said go look in a mirror. I said thank you.

imagine the russians showing up late to the 1917 revoloution with a tsarbucks in hand. they were late so I guess they weren't russian. They were probaly stalin.