Show jokes

What is an orphan's least favorite TV show?

"Full House."

Q: Why did the rooster cross the road?

A: To show he wasn't a chicken.

I was watching a TV show where a guy was hanging off a cliff, then the series ended... I guess you can say that they left that guy on a cliffhanger!

Your hairline goes so far back that the History Channel made a show about it.

What did the rapper say to the ATM?

"Show me the money, or I'll drop a BEAT!"

"BlessedBrian" is like Monday mornings... everyone dreads him, but somehow he KEEPS SHOWING UP.

I used to have a girlfriend who would argue with me a lot for no reason. I look at her feet and say to her, "Here is £15, give yourself a foot pedicure, then come back to me. It clearly shows you have man feet. You are a woman; you should have woman feet. No wonder you boss me around too much as if you're the man of the house."

Face-Timing My Girlfriend:

"Hey girl! Are you a veterinarian? Because these puppies are sick!" *shows muscle*

My wife said she wanted to leave me. She said it’s because of the abuse, but really, she’s the one abusing herself by drinking alcohol and got poisoning the next day. This shows almost half of the woman’s population is weak both physically and mentally.

One day I woke up and went on my phone. Some "pussy" was calling me. I answered it and said, "Hello, pussy?" and a pussy pic showed up.

Why did the chicken cross to the U.S. from Mexico?

To get to the U.S., but he had to show his papers first.

There was once a genie with a 10 foot weenie, and he showed it to the neighbors next door.

They thought it was a snake and hit it with a rake. Now it's only 6.4ft.

I watched the series of "Unfortunate Events" 4 times, all the shows 4 times. I am crying. I am trying to finish the rest, then my brother comes in and says it is PG (Parental Guidance). After that, my brother called me a baby, then he pushed me off my bed. 😭

Once upon a time, there was a poor man, a middle-class man, and a rich man. They were all talking about how they found happiness in their lives. The rich man said, "I found happiness through money and all of my assets." The middle-class man said, "I found happiness through my steady job and my loving household." The poor man said, "I may not have much, but I find my happiness through the little acts of kindness people show me."

And then the wall fell on them.

Why did only blonds show up at Saturday's party during the Corona crisis?

Because their computers flashed, "Virus blocked!"

What did the boy say to the noose?

"Can you please tie me."

Welcome to our Computer Show.

I'm Mars Argo.

Welcome to youtube.com.

STOP POSTING ABOUT AMONG US! I'M TIRED OF SEEING IT! MY FRIENDS ON TIKTOK SEND ME MEMES, ON DISCORD IT'S FUCKING MEMES!

I was in a server, right? And ALL OF THE CHANNELS were just Among Us stuff. I-I showed my champion underwear to my girlfriend and t-the logo I flipped it and I said "hey babe, when the underwear is sus HAHA DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DI DI DING." I fucking looked at a trashcan and said "THAT'S A BIT SUSSY." I looked at my penis. I think of an astronauts helmet and I go "PENIS? MORE LIKE PENSUS" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHGESFG

From the river to the sea, Palestine will be free.

My name shows it all if you can't see, IDC AT ALL, you can ban me.

But let me tell you one thing, Without God, Isr-el is nothing.

So let me say it again, one last time, Free Free Palestine!

This is bullshit! Stop showing cheesy and dumb jokes! This website is for dark humor, insults, and morbid content! All of you who don’t talk about the following, go die!