Short jokes
Kid: Dad, where are you going?
Dad: To get milk.
TEN YEARS LATER
Kid's friend: Where's your dad?
Kid: He went to get milk but never came back.
Q: What's an emo's favourite rapper?
A: Monoxide Child.
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Well, being an American is just a joke itself.
I was going to make a bulimia joke, but suddenly it just felt so empty.
When you went to McDonald's and sat down, you were so fat, they said, "TBC."
My dad has a pretty shitty job.
Where do you bring a canoe that doesn’t feel good?... The boat dock.
Why did the Hummingbird hum because he forgot the words?
Why is it that when Donald Trump and Melania make love, she is always on top?
Donald Trump can only F@#k up.
HEY NOT_KIARAH 01!
Why did Helen Keller walk in on someone in the bathroom?
Because she didn’t know it was the bathroom.
How long is it?
Why do you pay cash for the metro train in Newcastle upon Tyne?
How to protect your nuts from being hit: Just get hard.
I was going to tell a ghost joke, but it just seemed so mean-spirited.
Why is 69 annoying me? Oh, it's a tease.
How are Eggs Benedict and a blow job alike?
You can't get either one at home.
Why does the cannibal village not exist anymore?
They all ate each other.
I crashed into the back of a car at the lights today.
A really short guy got out of it and said, “I’m not happy.”
I said, “Well, which one are you then?”