Short jokes
They put the woman's rights in the fantasy section in the library.
What do a blonde and a doorknob have in common?
Everyone gets a turn ;)
I made a house for orphans and...
they had no clue how to use it.
Jack and Jill went up the hill 'cause Jack took a Viagra.
Jill was drunk, fell to her knee, Jack had his chance, did Jill till 3.
I love taking my daughter out in the car. Every time we go over a speed bump, I tell her we ran over another dog. 😂
My sister's name was Philma. We were unfortunate enough to have the last name Coochie. Let's just say no more virgins were at that school.
What do you call a gay scientist? Stephen Hawqueen.
I say 1, 2, 3, all the kids bullied me, but now they're not so cool, cuz I shot up the school.
Why did Sarah fall off a skyscraper?
Because she made her dad mad.
What did the cancer cell say to its neighbor?
"Mind if I join you?"
22 ants were playing football in a saucer.
One ant said to another one, “We'll have to play better tomorrow. We're playing in the cup!”
What do you get when you cross Donald Trump with Fregley?
Orange juice.
What does a 90 year old's pussy taste like?
Depends...
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What did the panther say at the poker party?
I'd be lion if I said I was a cheetah.
What do you call it when a girl on her period goes swimming?
A blood bath.
So I ran into my specialist doctor, and he said, "Pick a star sign, any star sign." So I said, "Capricorn," and he said, "Nah, you got cancer."
I donated to the LGBTQ community. Hopefully now they can find a cure.
Where did the cow go on his first date? To the moovies.
What does Germany and the rest of the world have in common? They both use gases to poison one thing or another.