Short jokes
Like if you meet someone emo.
Like if you wanna have sex.
Man: Can you be my girlfriend?
Woman: I'm lesbian, sorry.
Man: Oh, here's your rope.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You a dumb a** b*tch, We all know it's true.
You're so fat, no one was laughing, but the floor was cracking!
What type of cake can orphans not have?
Homemade.
If 80% of all suicides in the UK are males, and women want equality, then maybe they should just kill themselves.
Person 1: Did you hear the joke bout 9/11?
Person 2: No, but it'll probably crash and burn.
I work with animals!
What do you do?
I’m a butcher.
Why did the cat meow?
Because it's a cat, and they meow.
Do you have a shovel in your back pocket?
Why?
'Cause I’m digging that ass.
Somebody stole my joke.
So I stole their spinal cord.
"Hippity hoppity, the school shooter spotted me."
Why can orphans not grow big and strong? Because they need a parent to buy them steroids.
Where did Milky Way get its degree?
At the university.
How are a bald eagle and a bald man similar?
Because they both have eyes.
"Consent is just some fucked up feminist propaganda."
Smack an orphan, what’s he gonna do... tell his parents?
What do you call lesbian twins?
Lick-A-Likes.
Abortion is a difficult topic for me.
On one hand I support it because it kills children.
On the other hand, it gives women a choice.