Short jokes

Short Jokes

Magazine

Me: Hey, that's a really heavy bag, do you have a lot of books and magazines in there?

The Quiet Kid: Yeah, magazines.....

Lighter

The more I light my lighter, the lighter my lighter gets, until it's too light to light.

Homework

What does a chicken give you?

Student: Meat.

What does a pig give you?

Student: Bacon.

What does a fat cow give you?

Student: Homework.

Assault

Today was a bittersweet day...

Bad news is my friend was assaulted. Good news is I successfully sneak attacked someone!

Terrorist

What did the terrorist think to himself seconds before hitting the tower?

"Did I leave the stove on?"

Cat

If a cat or a dog plays Among Us, it will wanna be the impawstor.

Mama

Yo mama is so fat, when she sat on Walmart, she lowered the prices.

WiFi

Two people are sitting in a skyscraper.

P1: Hey, what wifi are you connected to? The company wifi is horrible.

P2: Airplane wifi.

Cannibal

Why did the student cannibal rush to the cafeteria?

He wanted to eat ahead of the others.

Computer

A computer is a HARDware device. How come someone still feels it is MicroSOFT?

Email

On reddit now. u/Long-Cat-4047. Also email is heavenskala1@gmail.com or Gowiththeflow349@gmail.com

Tarzan

What do you call Tarzan when he swings through the trees backwards?

Nazrat.