Short jokes
What do cannibals eat to freshen their breath?
Men toes.
Like this post to give someone you hate bad luck.
The last thing I told my ex after we broke up was, "At least we're still cousins!" 😂
Why did the chicken commit suicide?
To get to the other side.
I wanted to make a belt out of watches, then I realized it was a waste of time!
I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to join my family tree... She dropped the rope and ran.
I did a bungee jump for charity recently. It was called "spastics on elastics."
Two deer walk out of a gay bar. One of them turns to the other and says, "I can't believe I blew forty bucks in there."
You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.
Why are Republicans supporting giving felons the right to vote?
Because their own personal jeebus is a felon!
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire today.
Now they call him Hot Wheels.
I tried to make vegetable soup today, but the wheelchair didn't fit in the pot.
What did Captain Picard say when he brought his sewing machine to the repairman? -- "Make it sew."
How does a Muslim close a door? He islams it.
Why did the silly girl put sugar under her pillow?
She wanted to have sweet dreams. 😂
Sir William Herschel discovered Uranus in 1781, 200 years before you were born. How did he do that?
There is nothing funnier than my life. (Evan 2020)
Why didn’t the bike stand on its own?
It was too tired.
This dwarf was being mean to me, so I said, "When you get home, I hope Snow White kicks the shit out of you."
What's the difference between a good TV show and a gay man?
One makes your day and one makes your whole week.