Stephen Hawking isn't really dead, he's just rebooting.
Short Jokes
Think everyone who wrote these jokes are dead yet?
What's one thing gay people can't draw?
A straight line.
Where can you find some of the world's largest vegetables? -- In an American nursing home.
Does anyone still look at this? If you do, tell me if I should make more jokes :)
It's funny how Stephen Hawking sounds like Stephen walking or Stephen talking, but he can't do any of those things.
What do you call a group of redneck superheroes?
The Inbredibles.
What's the difference between Chris Brown and Santa?
Santa stops at 3 hoes.
What was the last thing to run through Osama bin Laden's mind? Probably a bullet.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to do it in the water. Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a daughter.
What do you do when you finish a magazine at a hospital?
Reload and keep shooting.
Did you know the pool in the Titanic is still full?
When you realize you have depression, and depression realizes how stupid you were.
Who can shave 20 times a day and still have a beard? -- A barber.
When someone calls you, say this: "Hi, welcome to Dave’s Orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may I help you?"
I don't like the word "gun".
Whenever I say it, people always get triggered.
Me: If a skinny person goes skinny dipping, then what do fat people do?
My friend: Chunky dunks.
Why can't a cheetah play hide and seek?
Because he's always spotted.
Why doesn't Barbie ever get pregnant? Because Ken comes in a different box!
I got into a fight with 1, 3, 5, 7, and 9. The odds were against me.
