Short jokes
What kind of fish knows how to do an appendectomy? A sturgeon!
How do you hire a horse? Easy. Just put up a ladder.
What do you call two old men drooling in their wheelchairs?
The 2028 US election.
Yo mama so fat, when she went up the elevator, the World Trade Center collapsed.
What do a gay man and a tumbleweed have in common?
They blow and blow until they wind up on a fence in Wyoming.
Why can't you fool an aborted baby?
Because it wasn't born yesterday.
Monkeys are big, but they sure can swing very lightly.
Why is it inappropriate when guys say their girlfriends are their “Partners in Crime”?
Like we get it, bro, she’s underage.
Are you made of Gallium and Yttrium?
Because you are looking a little bit GaY.
Are you made of gold, titanium, sulfur, titanium, and carbon?
Cuz you’re looking a little big Au Ti S Ti C.
I’m always the first person in line at school for lunch.
I just cut everyone.
What war did the black community win?
The Obama era. Only to lose to a smarter white person.
Did you hear about the man who jumped off a bridge in France? He was in Seine.
Not a joke.
Any girls looking for a steamy hot man?
You should watch Ryan ToysReview because he's not mean; he's a very nice boy.
Bitches be like "you're racist." You're right, and I'm gonna win.
Why were there only 3,000 Mexicans at the Battle of the Alamo?
'Cause they only had 4 trucks.
What do you call the fighters with an extra chromosome?
Downy unstopables.
"How would you describe yourself in three words?"
"Lazy!"
Why does Ezra Miller’s Flash run in a straight line in The Flash movie? Bro ain’t straight.