Short jokes
How do you tell the difference between a Communist and everybody else? The way they are spelled.
What's the difference between a skeleton and a baby? I don't set the skeleton on fire.
If we're all God's children, what's so special about Jesus?
There's a difference between my brother and Stephen Hawking.
At least Stephen Hawking does something.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?
The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
What type of comedy can't Steven Hawking do?
Stand-up comedy.
What is it called when a cow sings? A lawsuit.
What do you call a skeleton with no arms? An un-armed skeleton.
I'm late for my interview! Do you know where the nearest sex offender registry is?
How do you get a Japanese fanclub?
Walk around with a bundle of gas masks!
There was a math teacher on a plane that crashed. What was the last thing that went through their head?
A pentagon!
(9/11 joke)
What hood do zombies come from?
Dead Ends.
I'm ticked off by this tick joke!
This rat did the most amazing thing ever; it was pretty radical, dude.
Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
He had nobody to go with.
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his ass.
I've been going to the dentist for a while now, I know the drill.
Who is the biggest slut in the world? Ms. Pacman, because you give her 25 cents and she swallows balls until she dies.
I went outside to catch some dog, but I mist.
Space therapist in between the e and the r.
The rapists!