Short jokes
What do you call your son?
An mistake.
Press F to pay respects to Grumpy Cat!
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
How many fat people are in my house?
20, counting the kids in the basement.
What's a furry's favorite news network?
Fox!
I quit my job at the bank today. I lost interest.
Have you heard of bees? They're bee-utiful!
What do you call a deaf child?
-Ryan Simmonite-
People can say whatever they want about pedophiles. At least they are pursuing their dreams.
In a white van.
Aaron.
"Knife to meet you all!"
Do you want to hear a joke about a construction?
Sorry, still working on it!
Why didn't the koala make the finals? It got diskoalafied.
What do Jesus and I have in common? Our dads left us...
This will take a ton of time.
A skele-ton.
I lost all faith in humanity. I am moving to Uranus; it's really big. I might get lost.
An assassin threatens a planet.
The planet remains calm.
The assassin: "Do you not realize the gravity of this situation?"
My sister and I were both adopted from the same country, and my parents say they got us on a "two for one special."
Who is better than Alabama?
CLEMSON TIGERS!
How do you get Dick from Richard?
You ask nicely.
What did the substrate say to the active site?
"C'mon baby, we fit together, open my door lock to f**kin' key."