"Look at these kids stealing ideas, bro. They're going to jail."
Short Jokes
Why is there a middle school?
Because the kids that go there are middle class families.
Why do kids like bananas?
'Cause they like doing the nana.
What is one word orphans can't spell?
Family.
"Knock knock."
"Who's there?"
*slaps* "We ask ze questions!"
What do you call James Bond in a bathtub?
Bubble 007.
What do volcanoes and suicide bombers have in common?
They both erupt when triggered.
Are you my pantry? Because you look like a snack ;)
Hello, welcome to Joe’s Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce! How may I help you today?
I was digging and found some gold. I was going to tell my mom, then I remembered why I was digging.
Why did the sperm cross the road?
I put on the wrong socks this morning.
White people can't say the N-word, but at least they can say, "Thanks for the warning, officer," and "Hi, Dad."
I am like Cookie Monster on steroids when it comes to cookies.
Guys, we shouldn't make jokes about 9/11. My dad was a victim.
He was the best pilot in Arab.
Me: I'm home, ma! Here's her with a new dad. Her: Go hang with someone. Me: Gets the noose, goes to fav tree. I love you, ma. 🙂
I farted, try me. You farted? Oh no, we all farted.
The plane crashed, but I did too on a pillow.
What do you call a lesbian alien? A "lesbeening."
What’s the difference between 69 and High School?
In 69 you usually only kiss one c*nt and look at one a**hole.
My sister's friends are hilarious, like seriously, haha.
Yo mama so fat, when she said, "I want a boat," they gave her a naval ship.
