Sexual Act Jokes

Porn

My wife caught me one day for watching a porn channel, so I quickly turned the TV to a fishing channel. On her way out, she said: "You should stay on the porn channel. You know how to fish!"

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  • Brojob

    Why can a gay man give a better brojob to a heterosexual man than another heterosexual man?

    Experience.

    Dick

    What do five dicks sticking out of glory holes and five udders both have in common? They are ready for milking.

    Anilingus

    What is the difference between a man performing anilingus on a woman and a man performing cunnilingus on a woman?

    If a man is performing anilingus on a woman, it is not classified as heterosexual sodomy, you fucking idiot!!!!!

    Brojob

    How does a gay man trick a heterosexual man that is homophobic into giving him a brojob?

    The gay man puts mustard on his dick and then puts his dick inside a glory hole.

    Priest

    What's the difference between a rabbi and a priest? One cuts them off and one sucks them off.

  • 1
  • Brojob

    Why does a heterosexual man swallow the sperm of another man after he has given him a brojob?

    Because of the cream filling inside, just like the individually wrapped cakes of Hostess Twinkies.

    Race

    Two gay guys, two lesbians, and two pedophiles have a race.

    What is the order of finish?

    1. Lesbians. Doing 69 the whole way.

    2. Pedophiles. Coming in a little behind.

    3. Gay guys. Still packing their shit.

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  • Mom

    Iโ€™d pound your mom so fast, even Sonic would get jealous!

    Dog

    How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg?

    Pick it up and suck its dick.

    Father

    Your manna so fat your father will be coming around the mountain when he cums.

    Pickle

    Guy: Do you want a nickel?

    Girl: Sure.

    Guy: So youโ€™ll tickle my pickle?

    Girl: ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ

    Hate

    Shaenaya hates me, help! And she wants to suck off ******* and ****** and ***** and *****.

    Dick

    China servers are up on Fortnite, yeah, check by there.

    "China getting this dick in your mouth ๐Ÿ˜‚"