Sex jokes
Anal, haha.
She likes rough sex with handcuffs and I’ll be honest... She likes me to Chris Brown her when she acts like Rihanna.
She likes the Donkey-Punch. She likes the Dirty Sanchez. Sometimes she even likes to fool around in your bed!
"We make sexy time, yes, and every night I tap that."
Cause she knows how I like it, and that I’m a little young to be in the bed, butt-naked doin' your mom.
Yeah, she called me "Pledge" because I knocked the dust off it.
I was ridin' your mom like she was Mario Kart!
"Doin' your mom, doin', doin' your mom."
Indian porn
Ooooh oooh oooh
Baaaaaa
In Soviet Russia, gay sex gets you arrested.
In America, getting arrested gets you gay sex.
I heard my neighbors having sex, and it was annoying me, so I called my girlfriend to ask if she wanted to go out, but when I called her, I heard my neighbors' phone ringing.
Incest.
When "slow down and apply more lube bro" REALLY means slow down and apply more lube bro.
What did Stephen Hawking's wife say to him having sex? "You're wheelie good at this!"
What does a pulse and an orgasm have in common? I don't care if she has one.
You know sex is better than logic, but I could've proved it...
Why do some men call their testicles "bells"? Because it's next to their "ding-dong."
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?"
Man: "Yes!"
Reporter: "Name?"
Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim."
Reporter: "Sex?"
Man: "Three to five times a week."
Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?"
Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel."
Reporter: "Holy cow!"
Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general."
Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?"
Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style."
Reporter: "Oh dear!"
Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."
Why is Fairy's washing up liquid the best form of lubricant for anal sex?
No more tears.
So, no head?
What goes in dry and comes out wet?
A dick.