Self Harm jokes

If you don’t like mowing your lawn, just get emo grass! It cuts itself!

What do you call a group of depressed kids?

The suicide squad.

What's the best part about having emo grass?

It cuts itself!

My (at the time) boyfriend told our chemistry teacher that blood is corrosive to steel.

Anyways, my sharpener isn’t working because the blade has been too badly damaged from something else...

I just planted emo grass.

Ignore it and it cuts itself.

Preventing suicide is best done by committing it.

Mom: You will make me kill myself.

Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!

What makes emos jump?

Bridges.

There's two types of emo people:

1. People that cut side to side.

2. And people that cut up and down.

The most efficient is up and down.

I saw this girl with blue hair and slapped her wrist and said, “NICE CUT G!”

Walk up to an emo and say, "I like your cuts G."

Q: How do emo kids complement each other?

A: I like your cuts g.

What did I say to the bridge?

Bye, bridge.

You look sexy with that rope around your neck.

I wish the grass outside of my house was emo, because it would cut itself.

What do you call an emo that cuts too deep? Gushers.

Are you a knife? Because I want you.

A kid went and got a haircut. The day after, he went to school, and a friend says, "I like your cut." He replies, "Which one?"

What did the emo kid say to the cashier? ... "Scan my wrists."

I tried being an emo, but I never got the hang of it.