Scientist jokes
How do you execute Stephen Hawking?
The electric wheelchair.
There were 3 blonde scientists...wait that’s not the joke. The first one said “we are going to pilot the first unmanned spacecraft to land on the sun.”
The second one said “but we can’t do that - if we get within 5 feet of the sun we’ll freeze to death!”
The third blonde says “so we go at night.”
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite song?
"Highway to Hell."
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "Can I have a drink of H2O?" Then the second says, "Can I have a drink of H2O2?" and he dies.
Scientists make skyscrapers and airplanes.
Religion crashes them.
Memes
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He drove too far away from the power point/modem.
When I went to heaven, I saw Steven Hawking standing there. I asked why he isn’t in heaven yet. He said there are stairs.
What was Stephen Hawking's mother's name?
Ilean.
Have you walked into Steven Hawking's house yet?
Yeah, neither has he.
A new burger has been invented in memory of Stephen Hawking.
I doubt it will sell though, as it's 95% cabbage.
What was Stephen Hawking's name before he got his disease?
Stephen Walkins.
How did Stephen Hawking die? Because he didn't charge his batteries.
Have you ever walked in to Stephen Hawking's house?
No, neither has he.
Where did Stephen Hawking go after he died?
FNAF Sister Location.
What did Stephen Hawking's computer say when he died?
"ERROR"
Where was Stephen Hawking during the house fire?
The top of the stairs.
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a refrigerator?
The fridge actually runs.
What’s the difference between Isaac Newton and my Dad?
Isaac Newton didn’t beat me half to death with a pipe wrench.
Where do you take Stephen Hawking when he dies?
The Apple repair store.
A scientist discovered water on Mars. Mars 1, Africa 0.