Science jokes
Q: What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of Helium?
A: HeHe.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius, but his brother Frank was a monster.
What do you do with a dead scientist?
You barium.
What's black and sits on top of a staircase?
Stephen Hawking's after a house fire.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite type of music?
Rock and Roll.
Memes
A Biologist, a Chemist, and a Statistician are out hunting.
The biologist shoots at a deer and misses five feet to the left.
The chemist shoots at the same deer and misses five feet to the right.
The statistician shouts, "We got him!"
Fat person: "Hey, what's up?"
Friend: "Your blood pressure!"
What’s better than Stephen Hawking?
Stephen walking.
What do you call Stephen Hawking's wife? Siri.
Why is Stephen Hawking a bad influence on children?
Because he only looks one way when crossing the road.
What's black and sits on the bottom of the stairs to the cellar?
Steven Hawking where the experiments went wrong.
Now touring: Stephen Hawking unplugged.
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just killed?
Isaac Newton died a virgin!😎
What was on Stephen Hawking's gravestone? "Intel inside."
When Stephen Hawking was asked why he was instantly attracted to his new girlfriend, he said, "It's simple, she pushes all the right buttons."
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite TV show?
Robot Wars.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He ran out of battery life.
Just a joke: When Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said, "It'll get better, just walk it off!"
What do you call a gay scientist? Stephen Hawqueen.
I donated to the LGBTQ community. Hopefully now they can find a cure.