Science jokes
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius, but his brother Frank was a monster.
What do you do with a dead scientist?
You barium.
How do our brains remember that we forgot something, but we can't remember what that thing was?
What's black and sits on top of a staircase?
Stephen Hawking's after a house fire.
What’s better than Stephen Hawking?
Stephen walking.
Memes
What do you call Stephen Hawking's wife? Siri.
Why is Stephen Hawking a bad influence on children?
Because he only looks one way when crossing the road.
Once upon a time, fraternal twins, brother and sister, with almost 100% equal DNA were separated at birth. At the age of 42, they were married, had 2 sons and 2 daughters. They took an ancestryDNA test, and the results were scientifically sexually shocking.
What's black and sits on the bottom of the stairs to the cellar?
Steven Hawking where the experiments went wrong.
Now touring: Stephen Hawking unplugged.
What was on Stephen Hawking's gravestone? "Intel inside."
What's the difference between Isaac Newton and the baby I just killed?
Isaac Newton died a virgin!😎
When Stephen Hawking was asked why he was instantly attracted to his new girlfriend, he said, "It's simple, she pushes all the right buttons."
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite TV show?
Robot Wars.
According to all known laws of aviation, a bee should not be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground, but of course, bees fly anyway because bees don't care about what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, Black. Yellow, Black.
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He ran out of battery life.
Just a joke: When Stephen Hawking fell over and hurt his leg, his dad said, "It'll get better, just walk it off!"
What do you call a gay scientist? Stephen Hawqueen.
I donated to the LGBTQ community. Hopefully now they can find a cure.
Knock knock...
Who's there?
Not Stephen Hawking.