friend: hits head* others: how many fingers am i holding up? me: to friend* how suicidal am i on a scale from one to ten? friend: ten me: hes fine guys
Which part of a fish weighs the most?
The scales!
My wife wanted a present that could go from Zero to 80 very quickly.
So I got her a new set of bathroom scales.
My "overweight" friend and me were talking at lunch.
Overweight friend: Man, why you so ugly dude?
Me: *annoyed*Jason when you stepped on the scale this morning it asked for you're weight not you're phone number.
What's a rapist's favourite scale? C Minor.
your mama is so fat when she stepped on a scale it said damm
The lady was so fat that when she stepped on the scale, the scale responded with " i need your weight not your phone number"
A woman noticed her husband standing on a bathroom scale, sucking in his stomach. "Ha! Thats not going to help!" She said. "Sure it does." he said. "Its the only way i can see the numbers."
There was this man and he forgot about his wife's birthday. She was very upset and said that her present should come as fast as 1-200 by tomorrow. When she woke up she saw a present in the bathroom. It was a scale
your momma so fat when she stepped on the weighing scales her phone number came up!
Yo Mama so fat when she stepped on the scale it said-- To be continued
A pedophile is chatting on the internet : "On a scale of one to ten, how old are you?"
How does a fish always know how much they weigh? -- Because they have their own scales.
