Saw jokes

I saw a sign that said, "Falling Rocks." I tried it, and it doesn't.

I was taking a walk near the prison when I saw a good looking guy climbing down the fence, and when he noticed me, he gave me a sneer! It was pretty condescending.

Have you heard about the blind man who saw the accident and the dead man who heard it?

Three Indians get captured by an enemy leader, and the leader says, "Go in the woods and find 10 fruits of the same kind."

The first one comes back with apples. The enemy leader says, "Shove them up your butt and don't make a sound, or I will kill you." He gets to two and yells. The leader kills him. He goes up to heaven.

The second guy comes back and has grapes. He gets to 9 and laughs. The leader kills him. He goes to heaven.

The first guy asks the second guy why he laughed, saying he had it in the bag. The second guy said he saw the third guy carrying pineapples.

I was walking home when I saw children crossing the street on their own. I went towards him and tapped his shoulder and said, "Hey, little kid, you are not supposed to be walking on your own." The kid turns out to be a dwarf.

I saw two guys wearing matching clothing, and I asked if they were gay. They quickly arrested me.

So, I was walking around the outside of the building and I saw a kid and asked, "Where's your parents?" I love working at the orphanage.

I saw a fat woman at the bus stop today, so I asked her, "When's it due?"

She replied, "I'm not fucking pregnant, you rude prick!"

I said, "I meant the bus, you fat cunt!"

I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.

Flex tape can fix a sawed-in-half boat. Then how the f*** can it not fix the Titanic when it broke in half? Tell me!

I got pranked so many times. Once I saw two wheels rolling down the street. I heard this noise. I looked behind me. There's a legless man in a wheelless chair screaming, "HELP! I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE!" but I walked away. I knew it was a prank.

I saw a little girl crying, and I said, "Where are your parents?" That day, I got fired from the orphanage. 🤪

I saw your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing.

Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.

When I saw your face, it instantly made me throw up.

When I saw you, it instantly made me cry. LOL.

I saw a little boy sitting on a curb wearing rags.

I said: "Aww, are you an orphan?"

And he responded with "Yeah. What gave me away?"

And I said: "Your parents."

Unbelievable! When I searched “house of spades,” all I saw was a slave home!

I saw my sister sucking a big toe.

When I saw your hairline, I thought you worked at McDonald’s.

I had to go to my friend's house.

I went in her basement and I saw taped mouths that are KIDS in the basement... Is my friend OK???