Sad jokes

I played piano at a Worthmore disabled elderly center. Then after I was done, I said, "How about you give me a standing ovation?"

I regret it to this day. Now I am forced to live here at Worthmore, and sit on my wheelchair, sad and lonely.

My ex's love for me :(

I still love the dude sadly, but I won't take him back.

Why are we depressed? Is it because of that bully in your school, or because you have acne? How about when you listen to your sad song playlist? Maybe it's because you have no friends? Or is it the fact your anime girlfriend is fake? T^T

Why was the skeleton sad at the dance?

Because it had "no body" to go with.

Being sad is my only happiness.

I'm funny but sad, I submit jokes you'll love. Look for my name in jokes you've read. Anyway.

What did the man with no hands get for his birthday? Gloves. Just kidding, he didn't have the chance to open the gifts.

Little Jimmy asked his mom if he could take a bath with her since he was scared of being alone. She said, "Sure, just don't look up." He looked up and said, "Woah, what are those?" She replied, "Those are just headlights." He looked down and said, "What is that?" She said, "That's just a bush." The next day, mommy wasn't home, so he asked to take a shower with his papa instead. He said, "Okay, but don't look up." He looked up and said, "Woah, what is that?" His papa replied, "That's just a snake." Later that night, he asked to sleep with his parents. They said, "Okay, just don't look under the covers." After a while, he grew bored and went under the covers. Jimmy screamed, "Mom, turn on the headlights, the snake is in the bush!"

Why are you sad?

I’m depressed. I know black people could cry.

It's so sad that Stephen Hawking can't stand up for himself.

It’s so sad how Stephen Hawking was just rolling too far away from the outlet. RIP :(

What do you call a sad cup of coffee?

Depresso!!! LOL XD XD XD

What do you call a sad coffee?

Despesso.

Why was Sally sad?

Because she couldn't play pattycake. Sally doesn't have arms.

JACK smoked some shit in the casino bathroom.

Then fucked a slut, played some slots, took some shots, then shot a JOKER!

It's a sad story, because JACK killed himself, but he died with a smile.

I hate my birthday. For my first birthday my mom gave me my life. I liked it when it was new and fun. Now it's broken and sad and I wanna take it back.

Y'know what's really sad?

Why break the fourth wall when you can turn the third wheel?

Why were the tenants of the Twin Towers sad?

They ordered a pepperoni pizza, but they got PLANE.

There was a wedding so sad that even the cake was in tiers.

There are so many things going through my head. Sadly, none of it is a 9mm.

What's the difference between apples and orphans? Apples actually get picked.

I made a website for orphans, but sadly it didn't have a home page.