Toothbrush: I think I have the worst job ever.
Toilet paper: Ya, right.
You're the type of person to wash your hands after a shower.
My day started out great until I woke up.
Why do people eat cereal for breakfast?
Because why not.
Mom: Son, get up for school.
Son: I AM UP *holds up books and says I'm up* IM UP MOM!
My Dad went for some milk. He never came back :)
Hey guys, I use toilet paper.
Me and my friend's life story on a daily basis.
I have a daily routine where I take a crap every morning at 6 AM, but wake up at 7 AM. And it's not even a joke.
Good morning!
What is a good night sleep? I love it when you walk home and walk home from school and walk home and walk home from home and walk home and get a good night walk and walk home from school and walk home from school and walk home from school and walk home from school and walk home from...
I love going to sleep at night.
I did a walk through and walk home from school, and I got home.
What time is it when you walk out to the school?
Time to go to school!
I went for my routine check up last week, and everything was going great until the doctor stuck her finger up my butt. Should I look for a new dentist?
Waking up is the second hardest thing in the morning.
If a kid does not go to sleep during nap time, isn't he resisting a rest?
Habit.
So a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says tell me a joke. So the guy says: so a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says tell me a joke. So the guy says: so a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender says tell me a joke. So the guy says: so a guy walks into a bar and he asks the bartender for a drink. So he gives the guy a drink. So he gives the guy a drink. So he gives the guy a drink.
How does an Indian open his car?
"Boot, boot!" (in an Indian accent)
