What is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? One sticks to the roof of you mouth, while the other one doesn't!
I started a company selling land mines that look like prayer mats. Prophets are going through the roof.
Why do orphans live pm the street
They don't parents to put a roof over there head
I told my friend to fly a plane,
But he threw a ramp of a roof
I walked into a store and I pointed a stick to the roof and i said"this is a stick up"
My Mrs is going to hit the roof when she realises I've replaced the bed with a trampoline !
If iI don't get a bf by the end of this month, Christmas lights wont be the only thing hanging from the roof
A man walks into a rooftop bar and takes a seat next to another guy. “What are you drinking?” he asks the guy.
“Super Power Beer,” he says.
“Oh, yeah? I doubt it?”
Then he shows him: He swigs some beer, dives off the roof, and lands with no damage what so ever. He walks back into the bar.
“Amazing!” the man says. “Let me have some!” The man grabs the beer. He drinks it, jumps off the roof —and falls 15 stories to the ground. Splat. The barman says. “You know, you’re a real idiot when you’re drunk, Superman.”
jack and jill went up the hill jack fell down his *ss was bound, and jill continued up the hill jack came back and beat jill's back, and he got the ultimate kill.
What is the best way to catch a baby fron falling off the roof, With a pitchfork.
Kiwis forehead is so big when he leaves to go to work he has to use a sunroof to drive 😏
Q: How many dogs does it take to shingle a roof? A: It depends on how you cut em'
if an emo doesn't get better by Christmas Santas reindeer won't be the only thing jumping off roofs this year
What has one head, one foot and four legs? A: A Bed
Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: Never mind, it's over your head!
Q: How many letters are in the alphabet A.11 A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T
Your Mom so fat that she went on to commit suicide but the roof fell off.....
What does a skeleton tile his roof with? Shin-gles!
Person: where do i commit sucide Dog: roof Person: good idea
A man walking on his roof, carrying an axe. He drops it on someone below him and says "Sorry, It was an axe-cident!"
So, a guy walks into a bar, and he tells the bartender, "After this last drink, I'm going to the roof to kill myself." A guy sitting next to him says, "I wouldn't do that if I were you.", in which the man replies, "Oh yeah?" So, they both take their shots and go up to the roof. The guy says "You're not gonna die, watch this!" He jumps off the roof and comes back up. The man rubs his eyes and tells him to go it again. He comes down and comes back up. The man says "Cool, let me try!", and he jumps down only to kill himself. The guy goes back to the bar, and the bartender says "Superman, you're an asshole."
A man finds his son climbing the roof of his house. The kid kept using all sort of material to climb up, but the dad didn't pay much attention. Next day the kid went to the state tower, and kept climbing using some adhesive gloves. The dads asks his son for a second time: " Son! why are you doing this?" the son replies: "You told me to aim up high".
