Roast jokes

You're built like a double cheeseburger.

Your mom is so fat that the photographer had to go to the moon just to click the photo of her belly button.

Your eyebrows are far from home just like your dad.

You look too old to be living with your grandma.

When you ask for plastic surgery, they said, "We could not fix you, but the only way is to wear a mask to fix your ugly face."

I wanna die.

Roses are red, violets are blue, gum makes me beautiful, but what happened to you?

Teacher: Why were you late?

Me: Traffic.

Teacher: Did I did it?

Me: Did I even blame it on you?

Bro, whenever I look at you, Fortnite gets popular again.

What do you call a bunny jumping backwards?

A receding hairline.

I'd mop the floor with your face, but you might just mess it up more.

You think you're funny? Look at your hairline; it looks like a McDonald's sample.

You're so ugly not even your mom thinks you're beautiful.

You like bread toasted? That means you're roasted.

You have a head of a Malteser and a hairline VEGTA.

Your mom was dating a boy that had a twin brother, but she did it with the wrong one.

Your mum went to the dentist so she could install Bluetooth.

"Why can’t you be comfortable with my own body?"

"I think you should ask yourself that."

You're so ugly and fat, and you're so lazy you can't even get your ass up and walk.

What's the difference between a boomerang and your dad?

Boomerangs come back.