My dad told me that his dreams were shatterd a few years ago
Then i asked him how many years ago
He replied with ”when were you born?”
"Why do people call Americans excessive?"
"It was probably because of WWII."
"Oh you mean the war where America responded to the destruction of several ships and a harbor and the deaths of little over a thousand by completely flattening two cities and killing hundreds of thousands of people?"
It took Jesus 3 days to respond
Worst lag ever
Santa was asked to describe Mrs. Claus in three words. His response was, "Ho ho ho."
WHY IS THE MOON RED TODAY?The reason why the Moon takes on a reddish color during totality is a phenomenon called Rayleigh scattering. It is the same mechanism responsible for causing colorful sunrises and sunsets, and for the sky to look blue.
In heaven responsible for the joke is the English man for food the Italian man and for the law and order a German man.. In hell responsible for food is the English man for order and law the Italian man and for jokes the German man
My mother wanted to test my responsibility and wanted me to cook dinner for the family to help mean understand how it feels to constantly cook for a whole family. So me with my horrible humor decided to make a giant joke for when dinner time came around and so I just got four plates and set them in front of my family and I then said, "Here you are a fine African meal." then everybody looked at me in disappointment and then I continued to say, "what poor taste?"
Have you ever said no? Did they keep going?
There was a costume party on Halloween. Everyone was there except one guy. Many people asked his brother where he was. His reply was, "Oh, he wanted to be our dad for Halloween."
When you send her a dick pic but then she sends you one right back...
What did the canadian say when a guy shot his bever ?. It is ok i forgive you.
what do you say to an upset down syndrome person... “what’s bringing you down?”
If I called you gay you would probably hit me with your purse
So a daughter asks her father "dad what is you opinion on abortions?" So her father says why don't you ask your sister. The daughter responds "but I don't have a sister... Oh"
Knock knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya who? Sorry, I prefer Google.
I went for a job interview today and the manager said, "We're looking for someone who is responsible."
"Well, I'm your man." I replied, "In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."
