Remembering jokes

Remember kids, if ever you're bored, kick an orphan.

Who are they going to tell? Their parents?

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So I was digging in the garden and I found some treasure. I was gonna tell my wife when I remembered why I was digging in the garden.

In kindergarten, we were starting to learn how to use "big kid words." On Monday, the teacher asked everyone to share what they did over the weekend, but we had to use big kid words.

Eventually it got to my turn, and the teacher asked me what I did over the summer. I told her I read a book. She asked me what book, and to remember to use "big kid words." I'll never forget the horrified look on her face when I replied with "Winnie the Shit."

I remember when I was a kid, I thought the world used to be colorless.

I was kinda right. They used to not let colors in a lot of areas.

I’ll never forget the first time we met, but I’ll keep trying.

What is the worst combination of illnesses?

Alzheimer’s and diarrhea. You’re running but can’t remember where.

I asked an orphan where his parents were. Then I remembered, they're gone.

Latias is red.

Latios is blue.

You should always remember to put up your curtains because I Pikachu.

I've been looking for my parents for years.

For the life of me, I can't remember where I hid their bodies.

I decided that I'll end it all, but when I drove off, I remembered I forgot to do the dishes.

I went to ask my friend's mom if I could have a sleepover.

Then I remembered they did not have a mom or dad.

You know why the Twin Towers were more remembered? A hexagon is more commendable than a pentagon.

Remember 2000? It was scary.

WAIT! I remember how the joke goes! These two cannibals are hanging out eating lunch, which is a clown, you see, 'cause they're cannibals and one cannibal says to the other cannibal, "Does this taste funny to you?"

I’d tell a joke about my abusive dad, but I only remember the punch line.

So, I remember growing my own peanuts really well. There's one that's larger than the others. I can't keep my eye off of it.

I'm scared that it moves at night.

I'm being serious. I literally can't keep my eye off it.

I was digging outside and I found my child's old toy, so I ran to find him, but I could not find him, so I was searching for about 6 hours, but then I remembered why I was digging......

This kid was crying, so I asked him where his parents were. He just cried harder. I still remember him every time I pass that orphanage.

I still remember my dad's last words, "You c***! You let the ladder go, you cuuunt!"

Smack! He hit the ground and bled out.