Realization jokes

A woman is lying in bed after making love to her lover. After a moment, she starts to roll over, and in the process, she realizes that the spent condom is still inside her.

Worried, she wakes up her lover. She asks, “What should we do about this?” To which he replies: “Who was it?”

I've realized that suicide would solve all my problems... if I could just get the right people to try it.

How is a push-up bra like a bag of chips?

As soon as you open it, you realize it’s half empty.

I braced myself when I got in the car, but then I realized my wife wasn't driving.

A man was about to go into the bar with his dog when he realized the sign said, “No pets allowed!” He was about to walk away when another guy walked up with his dog. The 2nd man put on dark shades and said, “Just pretend you're blind!” He walked in with his dog, got a drink, then left.

The 1st man did the same thing, but when he walked in, the bartender said, “You know your ‘guide dog’ is a chihuahua, right?”

The man said, “They gave me a damn Chihuahua?!”

My wife (or husband) told me to get six cans of Sprite from the grocery store.

I had just realized when I got home that I had picked up 7-Up.

My Mrs is going to hit the roof when she realizes I've replaced the bed with a trampoline!

Me: My grandpa killed 100 nazis in WWII.

My Friend: Well my grandpa killed Hitler.

Me: *Realizes*

You know some of these jokes took me 9 minutes and 11 seconds to realize. When I did, it hit me like a plane.

Orphans around my area only watched Youtube Shorts.

I asked them and then realized they can't click the home button.

When you realize your friend standing next to you is adopted and narrates everything he does.

Steven Hawking was so excited for Christmas till he realized he got socks.

The pie tasted weird today.

Then I realized that my mother likes cooking pie with human flesh from C town.

When you're in a cage But it's not real!

Being in a cage But you have the key.

Being in a cage But nobody sees you.

Being outside of a cage, but it's empty.

Living and realizing you've been born into one.

Thinking someone cared about you But turns out they're toxic as fu**.

But you can't live without them.

The cage Is you. You have the key But you don't know how to use it.

You were sad because your grandmother died.

The next day, you were washing your face, and you realize sadness made your face BLUE.

Shrek once went to the movies and when he sat down he felt this slimy and sticky feeling on the chair, so he stood up and complained about his chair being dirty... until he realized that he forgot to wipe earlier... so he stopped complaining and went back to his chair and sat back down.

Ok, so I have a joke for you, go look in the mirror and when you realize, come back to me and tell me.

Hey guys, it's Hailey here.

I'ma start off with henlo ;-;

I know you guys aren't going to believe me because of the assholes who were faking to be me, but if you can try to believe me, I'll explain.

So, Jake, we can't really be together anymore, since we no longer can chat. I'm so sorry.

Basically, my parents caught us on here as you realized. Yayyyy.

I don't have time to say anything else. So I've gotta go, but thankyou guys for everything you did for me.

Also, you won't get any response from me so yea. So sorry guys ;-;

When you realize you forgot to mop your room, you hear footsteps.

Bro, my friend is always using zodiacs as an excuse.

The other day he said he couldn't hang out with me because of cancer. I told him to fuck off. Then I realized why he was mad after that...