Rape jokes

"_____ abortion clinic, you rape it, we scrape it.

_____ sperm bank, you spank it, we bank it."

What do you call a fat, ugly, and hairy woman with a rape whistle? A feminist.

Violence against women is funny :)

While undressing a woman, she told me she has AIDS. I told her she can't catch it twice, but she still kept screaming.

It's not rape if they can't say no. Duct tape.

It's only rape.

If she finds out.

Ever heard of a rape victim with Alzheimers? Yeah, neither have they.

Have you heard about the pedophile who was found guilty of robbery?

- He robbed children of their innocence.

I told the judge I thought she was unconscious before she woke up crying. The judge asked: "Why didn't you drug her again so she would forget?"

when is it normal to freeze before being raped?

when a policeman rapes you.

No means no, but if you use chloroform, it’s a guaranteed yes.

What are some other names for rape? There’s the classic “struggle snuggle,” but then there’s my personal favorite “fuck fight”.

Q. What do you call a gun that rapes someone?

A. An assault rifle.

Q: What's the hardest thing about losing your virginity?

A: Making sure she doesn't wake up.

I'm so mad I got arrested for rape, even though the girl never said no. The prosecution said she was mute, but how was I supposed to know? She never told me.

How do you rape a feminist? Tell her you are a woman and she will let you do whatever. You won't even need to force it.

This girl came to me and said, "I got raped in my sleep!"

I replied, "I done it as a joke."

-April 1, 2020

When you accidentally wipe a little too hard and your finger goes up your bumhole, triggering flashbacks of when you were 10 and your uncle stayed a few weeks. 😂

I was raped everyday for years. I can still smile. I hold the record for the widest asshole.

I got arrested on suspicion of attempted rape all because I was carrying some cable ties, a bit of tape and a piece of cloth. It's such a joke, I hadn't even bought the chloroform yet.