Ran Jokes

I named my dog 5 miles so when I walk him I can say I walked 5 miles random guy: I ran over 5 miles


"Hey, today was great."

"What happened?"

"I ran into my ex today."

"What's so great about that?"

"I was in my car."

2 friends are talking and the one says, "I had a good day today, I ran into my ex." The other guy replies, "How is that good?" The Friend says, "I was in my car."

I used to be a banker but I lost interest...

Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She always ran away from the ball.

Why can’t bikes stand? Because they are two tired (Too tired)

two lesbians adopted a cat that night the cat ran away why ?

because it heard one say i'm gonna eat that pussy


Russian, American, and Polish stood by the lake shore.

Russian ran ahead to dive and yelled "vodka" and the lake changed into vodka.

Polish ran ahead to dive and yelled "beer" and the lake changed into beer.

American ran to dive,slipped,and said, "oh shit".


So I ran into a woman the other day who says her vaginas is like a lottery ticket. She said it's because you have to be lucky to hit it... I thought it's because she was always scratching it.

If Mexico is an unredeemable shithole, then how come the Republicans' favourite senator, Ted Cruz, ran to Mexico as fast as he could after a little bit of snow in his home?