I walked into the party and the host asked me if I would like a slice of pie. I responded "yes" and he said: "okay, 14159"
Whats a pirates favourite key on the key board
Others: r
Rrrr you would think so but it be the C
So I went to the binoculars shop the other day, tell you what, they saw me coming.
Did you know that a lot of graves are put in churchyards? Yeah, they're pretty holey.
How does a turkey drive a car? He wings it.
What does it sound when a dragon sings? A fire alarm
Did you know that Iceland is only one sea away from Ireland?
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
At the funeral of a family friend, I was chatting to June, an elderly lady I hadn’t seen since I was a teenager. I was thrilled when she told me what a beautiful young woman I’d become.
On the journey home, I remarked to my mother how lovely it had been to see June again.
“Yes, it’s such a shame that she’s gone blind,” she said sadly.
I guess that corn is a-maize-ing
What do you call a kid watching Star Wars by themselves?
Hans Solo.
Why should you stay away from trees? - Because they wanna be leafed alone.
What do you tell a dead metal fan? Rust in peace
Your probably getting tired of these gravity jokes... but I keep falling for them every time
Police arrested a man who dropped his phone in the ocean. The was charged with a salt in battery.
They Are making a movie about clocks.
It’s about time.
A missionary was caught by cannibals. we was tied up and thrown into a big pot. The cannibals were chopping up vegetables and throwing them into the pot with the missionary. When they lit the fire under the pot, the missionary said, "You can't stew me. I'm a friar."
I would tell jokes about Kobe but they would just crash and burn
Three men walk into a bar.. you would have thought the last one would have ducked
What do you call a fruit that argues against the position it supports?
The Devil's advocado.
