Puns

MooMooMooMoo

My mom wanted me to brush my hair.

And I just told her that even pet animals don't like there hare brushed...

want to here a joke look at the Miami dolphins football recod

So there was this girl and her horse would not stop following her so she said ̈stop horsing around ̈

Get it horse-ing

Cao ni man sha bi lalla shabi

Murder:wanna play a game? me:ok (pulls out xbox controller)

Knock knock Hwos here? Far from home hwos far from home Spider man

Why was the baseball player stuck in the stadium???

'Cuz' he made his home run

A man was raping a woman and thought the year was 1970 and he exclaimed to the judge later that he was her husband. She got sent to the Asylum for Hysteria.

Wait, what? Was he actually her husband. He was a christian so that actually meant he was AFTER the rape.

Wait, what? the bible doesn't say that.

Actually yes it does and marital rape was legal until 1990.

WAIT WHAT? Thats not funny.

I'll tell ya whats funny, that you think the women have nothing to complain about.

Have you heard the latest pun about pizza?

Never mind. It’s too cheesy. 🍕🧀

DON’T READ THIS IF YOU HAVE NOT PLAYED SETTLERS OF CATAN! “Wheat is going on?” I asked my godmother. She replied “Godson, I really don’t know but could you please get me some m-ore Shloer.” “Ok, I’ll sheep if there’s any in the fridge!”

If you don't stop the pun, soon it won't be so fun.

Why does trump build a wall? There’s a such thing as a ladder.

I went shopping and then to the hospital and then to bed and then I promised to only say and once in a sentence

Two kids are out in the cold, with downpours of snow erupting from the clouds. One of the kids says something. Can we build a snowman that is going through puberty? The other kid says something else. Yes. It sounds cool. After a while, the snowman was finished, and some words jut out of the first kid's mouth: Wow! Look at that snowman! It's got hair all over. But I think it's missing something though. The other kid jumps a little and begins speaking. Oh, I know what it is! After a while, a body part made of a carrot and two cucumbers appears on the snowman's crotch. It is a penis and a ballsack. The first kid speaks. Icy what you did there. The other kid replies. Good thing I didn't slip up there. The first kid replies. Well, that's snow problem. The other kid then uttered this: These puns would make the most frigid individual crack-up. The first kid then says: I know, right? They then begin a snowball fight. The other kid then says: Only the men have snowballs!