Punishment

Punishment Jokes

Cat

Q: Why did the cat get a ticket?

A: He was caught littering.

Act

What do you call an act of “funny” discipline? A PUN-ishment!

Bee

What did the bee say after the execution? "The criminal has been beeheaded!"

Student

I used to be in a special needs class, and the teacher sent a student (if you want to call them that) out to the hall for being late.

I asked her, "Why did you send James out to the hall?"

She said, "He was a little tardy."

I replied to her, "I thought they all were."

Slavery

Slavery and discipline, it's kind of the same thing. You get whipped for doing the wrong thing.

Orphan

If you have anger problems, hit an orphan, because who are they going to tell? Not their parents.

Grandma

My grandma used to beat the hell out of me for coming home late. Guess who's late now?

Penalty

I was walking down the streets of Manchester when suddenly I saw Penaldo getting arrested! I heard the officer say, “This time I give you warning, there will be no penalty.”

That’s when Penaldo asked, “No penalty?!” and punched the police officer.

Shame on you Penaldo!

Hitler

God: Who ever kills Hitler will go to heaven.

Hitler: 👌👌👌👌

God: 😩😩😩😩

Frog

What happened to the frog that parked illegally?

He was toad away.

Get it?

Plank

When I was a child, I was made to walk the plank... We couldn't afford a dog.

Teacher

"Why did the band teacher get arrested?"

"For fingering a minor." Ahaha, so funny!

Bullying

One day at school, I made fun of a girl who lost her hair from cancer, and my parents made me shave my head.

The next day at school, I made fun of an orphan.

Sex Offender

Oh, sh**! I'm late for my interview! Do you know where the nearest sex offender registry is?

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  • Detention

    I got detention for giving an emo kid a glow stick... I tried to lighten his spirit.

    Sex

    A kid named Timmy said to his dad that he had sex with his teacher, and his dad was proud of him and gave him a bike.

    The kid said, "I can't use it; my butt hurts!"