Pleasing jokes

Dad: What did your older brother say before he lost his virginity?

Son: Dad, please don't.

Dad: Exactly.

A Roman guy walks into a bar, holds up two fingers and says, "Can I have 5 beers please?"

Hi, I'm Claire. I am new to this website. I have been seeing these "Legends," and I've been tracking one specifically, watersharky. I have questions about him. Is he nice, protective, single? If anyone has any more information about him, please tell me.

My life.

Kill me, please.

My Dad keeps beating me and my mom. Please call the police. My name is Jacob Upchurch.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Madam.

Madam who?

Madam foot got caught in the door, can you please open it!

Please encourage me to do suicide! ;P

FICTIONAL BOOKS / AUTHORS

Outdoor Entertaining by Patty O.

Over the Mountaintop by Hugo First.

Plumbing for Idiots by Duane Pipes.

Music Theory by Amanda Lynn Player.

Meterology 101 By Wendy Reign and Sonny Daze.

Oh God By Dixie Rect.

Please Don't Stop By Craven Moorehead.

Life And Times Of A Porn Star By Dixie Normous.

Right Stuff By Dang Lin-Wang.

How To Take Care of Your Cat By Connie Lingus.

Right Way 2 Orgasm By Buster Cherry.

The Unwanted Child By Brooke N Rubbers.

DON’T READ THIS IF YOU HAVE NOT PLAYED SETTLERS OF CATAN!

“Wheat is going on?” I asked my godmother. She replied “Godson, I really don’t know, but could you please get me some m-ore Shloer?”

“Ok, I’ll sheep if there’s any in the fridge!”

My forehead so big,

big like Biggie Smalls. I love cock, please bum my hole.

Hi.

To whoever @heil dem anfuhrer is, I hope you know I can’t understand what you’re saying. So next time you get on an American website, please speak English, and I don’t speak whatever European language that is.😊

What did Little Johnny say to his dad?

Johnny: "Dad, please not again! I'm too young!"

I'm an orphan, please stop it. It's not nice and it made me cry.

Orphan jokes are just hurtful, and that is all they are, so please stop.

When a man loses his testosterone,

Man: Could I please have a loaner boner?

1273 please kill me, everyone hates me.

I'm a poor Indian, please help me.

I just want to say this...

You have NO maidens, (Explosion) No homies, (ExPlOsIoN) And no—please don’t say it! Rizz 😎 (EXPLOSION)

Guys, I have a dilemma. I'm a beta, please help!

Lionel: Leona, please no more singing your annoying Fuzzy Bear song!

Leona: But I love my song, right Fuzzy?

Fuzzy Bear: I am going to bite you for not letting your sister sing my song!

*Fuzzy Bear bites Lionel*

Lionel: AHHHHHHH