Pilot

Pilot jokes

Twin

What did the pilots say before crashing into the Twin Towers?

"We can't go over it, we can't go under it, we go through it!"

Dad

Guy 1: Hey, can you stop making 9/11 jokes? My dad died during it.

Guy 2: Sorry, I will stop. What was your dad?

Guy 1: The pilot. He saw a KFC and wanted it, so, well, you know.

Lesson

The last time I had flying lessons, I hit some building in Manhattan. Then my Uncle got shot in 2008. Darn...

Memes

Uncle

My uncle died in the 9/11 attacks. He was the best pilot I had ever met.

Parachute

The greatest doctor, smartest man, young geek, and inspiring preacher are on a plane. The pilot dies of a heart attack and is confirmed by the doctor. But, there are only 3 parachutes on the plane. The doctor takes one and says,

"People need me for my excellent medicine!" and jumps out. The smart man grabs one and shouts,

"People are in need of my great knowledge!" and jumps out. There is only one more parachute on the plane. The preacher says to the geek,

"You are too young. Take the final parachute and go." The geek instead says,

"No, there are two parachutes left, the 'smart' one took my backpack."

Helicopter

Helicopter, helicopter, Kobe Bryant in my chopper, Sitting next to burning daughter, Lots of smoke and little laughter.

Twin Towers

I hate when people make jokes about the Twin Towers.

My dad died on 9/11. He was a great pilot.

9/11

Why did the people in 9/11 not call 911? Because it would call the pilots.

Terrorist

What are the similarities of GTA V and 9/11? A plane can be stolen and crashed into a building by a bunch of terrorists.

Guy

Guys, you shouldn't joke about 9/11.

My great-uncle died that day. Best damn pilot in Iraq.

9/11

My dad died in 9/11. At least he did what he loves best: flying planes.

Jenga

Q: Why can't pilots play Jenga?

A: Because they will just hit the Twin Towers.

WW2

What's the worst thing to happen to a Japanese person in WW2... being drafted as a kamikaze pilot, or existing with a Fat Man or Little Boy?

Actor

As an actor going to film a new TV show in another country, when TSA asks, "What’s the purpose of your visit?"... "I’m going to shoot a pilot" is never a good answer.